paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
