Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
