she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
