Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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