chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
