The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I touched a dick in church today
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