Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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