Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
