dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
