with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
This is my gift to your gina
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
