She is in my trunk
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
