i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Randomize
