I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize