it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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