I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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