Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
