You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
