So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i love accidental penises.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
