I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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