these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
