I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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