what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
