I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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