Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
