I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
