Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
