I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
