if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
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