Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize