Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
