you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I think a kid would responsible me up
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
