I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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