you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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