yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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