whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
