okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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