you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Randomize
