Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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