Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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