he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
