no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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