He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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