i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize