He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
