so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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