So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
