hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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