I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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