Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
