I want to stick my p in your. b.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I forget how to act sober
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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