No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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