he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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